Tag: Be Happy

Empowerment Blogging

Creating Your Niche

Takeawalkinmyflipflops
Create your niche
Create your niche without loosing who you are.

Have you ever felt the pressure to define yourself in a certain way on social media, your online presence or in life? What if I told you that maybe trying to fit in isn’t what is going to make you stand out from the others. Wouldn’t you like to gain followers that will actually matter and stick with you for the long haul or attract people based on who you are as a person and not a trend or fad? The things that make you unique are what will attract this tribe and followers. You can create your own niche despite what others may tell you.

I’ve been told my whole brand ambassador career what I needed to do to get gigs. Things like be a certain size, look a certain way, cover up the Southern roots or wear heels to distract from being short, people have said. I’m polite and I’ve always been respectful of people speaking to me. I convince myself when people give advice they mean well.

Don’t believe the highlight reel

My rule though is if a person advising me isn’t where I’d like to be I’m certainly not going to look to them as a mentor or follow their path. Don’t believe everything you read and see on social media; it is only a highlight reel (for some people). Everyone is different and some don’t want to share their negatives even if flaws are what makes us unique and human.

My goal isn’t to have a highlight reel. To me life is about community over competition. I want to see other people succeed and I’ll clap for you. When someone looks at a photo of me @thevirginiahypegirl I don’t want them to be trying to figure out what preset I’m using or program, what fancy camera I have or how much I paid for the look. I want someone to see a woman just like them, that has worked hard to get where she is and proof that they can over come too. I share my life to inspire and encourage others.

I am beautifully broken not photoshopped perfect. I’m not afraid to talk about overcoming or to show you my vulnerability. I’ve posted about hitting rock bottom, dealing with loss and having major health set backs. All in hopes that maybe by sharing my highs along with my lows someone will take comfort that life isn’t perfect and neither am I.

If you don’t have this kind of confidence in yourself or know yet what you bring to the table it’s ok. Please don’t ever loose who you are in trying to find yourself, especially if you are comparing yourself to someone else and their journey. Don’t let other people trick you into chasing dreams that aren’t even yours. If something you are creating or doing feels forced then maybe you should rethink it.

Be cautious of who you trust

In your quest to build your tribe (followers) be caution too of women who proclaim to support other women. These women do exist, but often jealousy and the green eyed monster rears its ugly head, especially in groups of women. I’ve seen more women use this line and still tear other women apart at the same time. Be cautious of who you trust. A woman that picks at another women will likely do the same about you behind your back.

It is ok to be different. Remember that sometimes two people can have the same recipe, but have completely different tasting dishes. You don’t have to fight anyone for your piece of the pie…it is already yours. If I have to be fake or someone I am not I don’t want that kind of success and you shouldn’t either. If it isn’t exciting to you it can come across as forced and it won’t be interesting to your audience either.

I am proud of being me and I want to encourage others to stand out instead of fitting in. Maybe someone is out there silently reading this and I can only hope because of something they read by me they too decide to not give up. Fight for yourself and for what you believe in. Figure out what you want to share with others and don’t hold back. In doing this you will attract people that will share your passion and build a real community.

Empowerment Blogging

Don’t Let Your Inner Grinch Steal Christmas

Takeawalkinmyflipflops

Who is the Grinch?

Most have seen the holiday classic of How the Grinch Stole Christmas or heard the holiday song about him. As a child I found the movie to be funny and simply amusing, but as an adult this classic childhood favorite actually provokes more thought. If you haven’t seen the original cartoon or movie remakes I’ll give a brief synopsis. The Grinch, is a foul, green character created by the author Dr. Seuss and first mentioned in a 1957 poem The Hoobub and the Grinch. He is a hermit that lives alone high above the town of Whoville on Mt. Crumpet with his loyal dog Max.

Seeing Whoville celebrate Christmastime is especially aggravating for the Grinch. The Grinch finally takes action when the Whos decide to make their Christmas celebration even bigger. He concocts a scheme to pose as Santa Clause and literally steal Christmas from the Whos. Yet despite having their material Christmas items taken from them the Grinch finds he can’t take away their Christmas spirit. With the help of of young Who, the Grinch has a change of heart and rediscovers happiness, love in the season and his Christmas spirit.

Is the Grinch relatable?

Perhaps we all have a little bit of an inner Grinch in us and if we aren’t careful it can steal Christmas!

Aside from the green getup and the fictional town with traditional Dr. Seuss rhymes it is a very thought provoking storyline. The term Grinch is used often still in fact to describe people that don’t want to celebrate or participate with a group (especially during the holiday season). We’ve all encountered that grumpy person that seems to despise everyone and everything around them.

In the story the Grinch had a difficult childhood and was hurt by others. As an adult I think many of us can relate to the Grinch. So many of us have memories that come rushing back during the holiday season. Not everyone had a Norman Rockwell Christmas and for those that did growing up and loosing those special people may also, make the holidays an emotional time.

Tips to Suppress Your Inner Grinch and Save Your Christmas Spirit

During this season of love and light many feel a need to hide from the holiday season or to be reclusive despising other people being happy and celebratory. Learning to recognize the incoming emotional overload, setting boundaries and dialing things back is so important to prevent a holiday melt down. With Christmas festivities, the impending new year and all the pressures abound I encourage you to set aside time to allow yourself to breath.

Don’t be afraid to take in the quiet moments or to literally unplug and be still. The world won’t come to an end if you go off social media for awhile, turn off the Netflix or skip out on a stressful holiday event. Be mindful and spend time in the moment this holiday instead of letting your own thoughts become a brick wall or the pressure from others bring out your inner Grinch. If we aren’t careful the Grinch can steal our Christmas too.

Empowerment Blogging

𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲…𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐩𝐢𝐳𝐳𝐚!

Takeawalkinmyflipflops

The concise saying, “You can’t make everyone happy, you’re not pizza” packs a lot of truth in just a few words. It’s a reminder that trying to please everyone is an exercise in futility – some people will always find something to complain about no matter what you do. Just like pizza is universally enjoyed, there is no one person or thing that everyone will unanimously enjoy or approve of 100% of the time.

We all have diverse tastes, perspectives, and expectations. Attempting to cater to all of them is impossible. If you try too hard to accommodate every single criticism, request, or demand, you’ll drive yourself crazy and likely end up pleasing no one. You have to stay true to your own values and priorities rather than chasing the impossible goal of universal satisfaction.

There will always be critics and contrarians. Not everyone will appreciate your best efforts – and that’s ok. As long as you act with integrity and thoughtful consideration, you can feel confident that you’re doing your best. But you have to make peace with the fact that you simply can’t shape yourself into the perfect people-pleasing pretzel for all.

Your energy is better spent focusing on those who appreciate you as you are. Be the best version of yourself, and let the naysayers be. Just like pizza, you can be amazing while still having a few people pick off the toppings they don’t like.

The bottom line is – you’re not pizza. Don’t bend yourself into an endless knot trying to satisfy every taste. Be your authentic self and find contentment with those who savor exactly that. As life goes on sometimes friendships fall apart, people fall out of love, marriages dissolve and family members choose to become distant. I’ve been in many situations in my life and I still ask myself why do people give up on each other?

When we grow as people we often change and our views and priorities don’t stay the same. People sometimes literally do grow apart from each other, their priorities no longer align and they forget the reasons they enjoyed each other’s company to begin with. There are always two sides to every story and some say that there are reasons relationships, friendship and family ties can’t be fixed or that the bridge is burned.

Sometimes I feel 100 years old inside with all the things I’ve seen and felt. I think back on happy memories with people I was once close to and I still feel the sting of being disregarded like yesterday’s news. I feel I would have swam an ocean for those I know now wouldn’t have jumped a muddy puddle for me.

Relationship between people aren’t perfect, but, from experience I’ve learned anything that comes easy will go easy too. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but don’t let pride get in the way or make hasty decisions. Fight for those that you love. Don’t be afraid to say you’re sorry and if you have to put an end to things agree to disagree and do it on good terms. Remember that you’re not going to make everyone happy and that’s ok.

If you have people in your life that showed up for you when you needed them don’t ever forget to tell them how much you appreciated them. I know I wish I would have heard a simple, “thank you”, many times. Sometimes the unanswered questions will be the ones that cause the most thought.

Empowerment Blogging

Best Advice for Sticking to a Routine

Takeawalkinmyflipflops
Listen instead of read…

Many of us try to get into a routine, whether it’s exercising and eating healthy, financial habits, or staying free of clutter. The hardest thing for most people is to stick to it long enough for it to become ingrained. Once you get into the habit of doing something, it’s much easier to keep going – it’s building that habit that’s difficult.

Take Advantage of a Life Change

Most of us want to be healthier, workout more, eat whole foods instead of junk foods, be more positive, and so on, but if we’re not motivated to do it, it’s easy to procrastinate until tomorrow becomes a year, or even a decade.

This advice can help make it finally happen now.

Many ingrained habits are associated with cues from your current schedule and environment. Recently, I had a family member for example, that was faced with a major life change. This life change was buying a new home among the Washington, DC houses for sale. A move can be scary, but it is also, a great time to establish a new routine because many things will be changing anyway. New habits will feel like less of a shock when they’re part of a bigger transition. This is something that has even been proven by science – researchers, led by Dartmouth College Dr. Todd F. Heatherton, found that more than 35 percent of successful changes were linked with moving to a new location.

Focus on What Motivates You

If you can keep your “eye on the prize,” focusing on what motivates you, you can use that for inspiration to keep going, helping to make your new routine an established habit. For example, if you’re trying to eat healthier to eliminate or decrease symptoms of illness, think about how much better you’ll feel. By concentrating on how you’ll feel once you achieve your goals, it can help you stay on track.

Don’t Make it Difficult

If your new routine involves going to the gym four times a week, be sure you have your exercise clothing and other gear packed the day before. If you wait until the last minute and can’t find something you need, it can be easy to give up and forego it altogether. If you’ve been struggling to eat healthy at work, prepare meals ahead of time so they’ll be ready to grab and go. Or maybe your goal is to get into the habit of thoroughly cleaning the house every Saturday morning – be sure you have all the cleaning tools you need before Saturday rolls around. The easier you can make it on yourself, the better. 

Reward Yourself for Accomplishing Smaller Goals

It’s important to set smaller goals on the way to reaching bigger ones so that it doesn’t feel so overwhelming. Define a more progressive set of goals, stepping stones that allow you to build up to your primary goals. You can make this work by giving yourself a reward that will keep you motivated every time you accomplish one. When you don’t, you might donate a preset amount of money to a charity, family member, or friend.

Get support

Share your intentions for a new routine with a friend, or perhaps on social media. If you only have yourself to account for, it’s a lot easier to skip it. If you know someone who wants to develop the same new routine, even better as you can motivate each other. Surrounding yourself with others who encourage better habits is one of the best ways to develop and stick to a new routine.