Tag: depression

Empowerment Blogging

Enjoy the Moment

thevirginiahypegirl
Enjoy the moment. Don’t waste your energy on things you cannot control.

We live in a world focused on the next big thing. Retail puts out beach chairs at Easter, fall decor before summer ends and Christmas with the Halloween candy. Influencers on social media publish holiday gift guides in August and everyone seems to have Christmas trees up in perfectly decorated homes. We are bombarded and sometimes overwhelmed by what is coming and often pushed to feel we must keep up.

If you’re a fan of a certain holiday or season I can understand the push to get there quick. I don’t fault people for doing what makes them happy. I wonder though with so many people seemingly focusing on the next big thing how many are enjoying the moments they are in. If you feel that overthinking a situation or spending more time focusing on upcoming things besides the present moment is causing your stress, practicing mindfulness can be beneficial to making a positive thought change.

Being mindful of the present can direct our thoughts and focus away from stressors. This isn’t to be confused with making future plans/goals. These types of future thinking and planning shouldn’t be stressful, but should help facilitate growth and positive change. You don’t want to eliminate them. Dwelling on what is to come or what needs to be done however can cause stress. Take time to listen to yourself and understand your own thoughts.

It can be difficult sometimes with all of life’s distractions to keep one’s attention in the present moment. Mindfulness isn’t easily maintained and can require lots of practice to get one’s focus back on the present. Some individuals find that by focusing on the senses of sound, feelings in the moment or other real time sensations they are able to better focus on the present. There are many teachings/therapy models that involve mindfulness practices.

I have found that by allowing myself some quiet time alone with my thoughts or to meditate helps me better focus on the present. Studies have shown that people who are able to practice mindfulness are better at managing their depression and anxiety. It is worth the effort to strive to be more mindful and aware of the present. Positive thinking is a gift and it can transform your life. Remember one day at a time. You’re doing great!

Empowerment Blogging

What does mental health mean to you?

thevirginiahypegirl
When someone’s personality changes it might mean more than they are just having a bad day. Don’t be afraid to ask someone if they are OK.

Sadly the topic of mental health is still very stigmatized in our society. If someone we knew were to break an arm for example most people would send them a get well card, maybe visit them in the hospital or call to check on them.However, mental health related issues, battling depression or anxiety is not treated the same by society.

Yet, mental health issues are just as serious as the broken arm example (if not even more serious).Unlike a physical ailment such as the broken arm where a cast is worn, mental illness often can’t be easily detected by friends/family. Many people that have mental health issues fight them in silence.

Mental health is often a taboo topic. With this reality those that suffer may not want to speak about their mental health issues due to worry about being judged or rejected by society. Don’t be fooled and think just because someone looks ok on the outside that they are.

I went to work and went on with daily life after assault and abuse. I kept a pretty front on the outside even when my mental health had been effected and I literally felt like I was dying on the inside. Nights awake paralyzed in anxiety, feeling utterly alone, crying in my car after work, taking extra showers or going into the bathroom so I could have a place to cry were a dark reality.

Do your part to help others

Not everyone can speak out about their issues. Do your part and pay attention to your friends? family and co-workers. When someone’s personality changes it might mean more than they are just having a bad day. Be vigilant of changes and don’t be afraid to ask someone if they are OK. Be kind to strangers that you don’t know too. Smile at people and offer to lend a hand if you can.

You never know who might desperately need a little bit of kindness. We must all work to make others feel included and loved. Eradicating stigmas and prevention of labeling is important. Judgment and bullying should be unacceptable in our society period.

If you see someone doing something to another person and can safely intervene, don’t be afraid to step in and stand up for someone who might not be able to stand up for themselves or notify the police/authorities to help. Help make a stand for mental health. You never know you could save a life!

Empowerment Blogging

Page 1 of 365-Curbing Imposter Syndrome

thevirginiahypegirl
do it for yourself
Don’t be silent about your feelings, remember you and your thoughts are valid and important!

Welcome to the new year! A fresh page, number 1 of the 365 that will make up 2022. Many people have been posting their new year’s resolutions and some will have broken them within a day of posting them. I personally stopped making resolutions years ago and instead focus on the goals I wanted to achieve in the coming year and reassessing my long term goals.

Since I can remember imposer syndrome has given me a fear of failure and made me think I needed to be superwoman to be defined as successful. If you do not know what imposter syndrome is, basically it’s an internal battle of not believing one is as competent as other people perceive.

What is imposter syndrome?

My own thoughts will make me believe I am not worthy of the compliments or praise I get from interactions with others or my job. Imposter Syndrome has made me disregard or dissect most praise I received in life. It gives me guilt about being seen as successful. To combat these feeling I had to write a new script for my mind’s responses and separate my internal feelings from fact. It took me a long time of learning to practice self-love and self-acceptance to not have these feelings daily.

Finding a Way to Cope with Imposter Syndrome

Some people see hanging up diplomas or having a trophy case for example as pretentious, but seeing my accomplishments daily verifies my success in what I choose to accomplish. Visual reminders of my personal success help me to chase away the feelings of not being good enough/imposter syndrome. Everyone has to find out what works for them personally to help them feel comfortable in their own skin.

Please do not allow yourself or other people to make you feel like you don’t matter. Do not be silent about your feelings, remember you and your thoughts are valid and important. Imposter Syndrome like anything can be overcome. Do not ever feel like you’re alone in your journey! There are many free resources that are only an internet search away my friends.

In this new year invest in yourself and do things that make you feel good about yourself. Take away: We all are dealing with something in our lives no matter how perfect things look from the outside. Imposter Syndrome is real, but it doesn’t mean I couldn’t find ways to work through it. I’m not too proud to pretend my life is perfect. Thoughts are not facts and this year I will strive to give myself more grace and kindness .

Empowerment Blogging

How will you use your energy in a New Year?

thevirginiahypegirl
Inner peace is everything, don’t let others steal it! Now is the time to make a commitment this new year to making boundaries to protect yours.

During the day are you using your energy to manifest positive thinking? Are you focused on being kind to others, promoting healing, growth and attracting positive things or are you using your energy to worry or be negative and in turn attracting negativity. We control our own mind and thoughts. Imagine what good could be done if we all focused our energy in a more positive way. A new year is quickly approaching and it’s a great time to evaluate how you’re using your energy.

A way to help manifest positive thoughts could be as simple as smiling at another person. Being kind isn’t exactly a new year’s resolution, but small gestures of kindness can go along way especially to someone that desperately needs it. Changing one’s mindset can be hard sometimes especially when we ourselves might be hurting too, but I always find when I’m kind to others that kindness eventually is returned to me full circle. Being kind to others even when I’m having a bad day seems to make me feel better too.

Another step towards a more positive mindset is making amends with one’s own past. This can really help to remove negativity and help to facilitate positive thinking. Why let someone that has done wrong continue to live rent free in your head? Forgiveness can be hard, but holding malice in one’s mind doesn’t effect the person that did the wrong as much as it does the person holding onto the hurt. Perhaps it is time to accept and burry these feelings for good.

Positive thinking isn’t going to be easy if all one’s thoughts and focus is on negativity and downing yourself either. On the quest for positivity one should never compare their journey with the journey of others. Falling into any type of comparison trap can rob one of inner peace and should be avoided.

Doing things that foster good feeling and happiness like taking a walk or going for a run to clear one’s mind can be beneficial for example. Taking care of your physical self and your body will effect the mind too. Staying away from other people that are negative or behaving in a manner that makes you uncomfortable is another way to make sure you keep up positive thinking. Inner peace is everything, don’t let others steal it! Now is the time to make a commitment this new year to making boundaries to protect yours.

Empowerment Blogging

Would You Meet Them For Coffee- Social Media and Disconnection

thevirginiahypegirl

We now have the option for our phones and apps to tell us how much time we have spent on certain tasks and on social media. When you look at how you’ve spent the day, weeks or months are these hours reflecting the life you want to live? As a blogger I depend on the internet to get my content out. I know there are many positives to social media. The internet and social media for example is a necessity for many small and big business alike. It can channel traffic and help create sales that otherwise may not be possible. It helps many stay in touch over the miles and to reconnect with people from our pasts or allow us to connect with people across the globe we otherwise wouldn’t have met.

The Dark-side of Social Media

Many aspects of using the internet can be convenient, but I ask myself what will the effects be on socializing long term.

There is a dark side to social media use, the addictions that can develop over the use of it and the effects from it. Recent light has been brought on protecting children’s safety online and the negative effects of social media on young people. Instagram’s head Adam Mosser himself was made to testified on the Hill to the Senate earlier this month. Whistleblower led information has developed about Meta’s (Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp) own internal research and the algorithm promoting negative body image in young users.

Many seem to make a push to do everything online and avoid face to face interactions. Social media and our use of the internet in some ways has helped to fuel disconnection. Many aspects of using the internet can be convenient, but I ask myself what will the effects be on socializing long term. A simple Google search will give links to different articles looking at the reduction of social skills in relation to use of technology and the internet, especially in younger people.

Call Me Old Fashioned

What happen to the days of handwritten thank you notes, sealing a deal with a handshake and people meeting for coffee??

I’m not that old and I find myself asking what happened to handwritten thank you notes, sealing a deal with a handshake and people meeting for coffee? Call me old fashioned, but I honestly don’t like the road we as a society seem to be on. So many people seem discontent with their lives and suicide is at a record high. I’ve personally had two people in my family unexpectedly commit suicide this year. These losses really made me start thinking more about where I put my own time and thoughts.

I think many get on social media trying to make a connection, but in the end feel more disconnected, empty and alone. Social media is full of photoshopped perfect pictures, highlight reels of everyone’s lives and accounts full of purchased followers, likes and comments. Social media and sharing can be fun, but it can also, be stressful. With changed in the algorithm it can be especially frustrating for example to a blogger or creator that feels like they are spinning their own wheels when their content isn’t getting shown.

Looking at your friend’s list on social media, how many people would you actually go out for a cup of coffee with? People we see might have the famed 10k following, but be as shallow as a muddy puddle in real life with no real life friends. The next time you’re down on yourself due to comparing yourself to the people on your social media feed maybe consider asking yourself this thought provoking question. There is so much good that can be done with time like volunteering or connecting to real people in our own family and communities. I’m not going to be idle and let the opinion of those that I wouldn’t want to take to coffee in real life get me down or fall into the comparison trap and I hope you won’t either.

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