Stigmatized: No Babies

One of the top questions I get asked by other women in life is do I have children. More times than not when I answer back that I do not I am probed for more information. For me personally I’m not going to have a conversation about it with someone I don’t know or that doesn’t know me or my story.

I think that it is rather unfortunate that in today’s society with as far as women have come that women would want to pick on another woman because she does not have children. Asking if someone has children is small talk, but if you go beyond that question to ask another woman WHY she does not have children I feel like it is a very judgmental question.

Not knowing the background of another woman’s life you have no idea what her reasons are and she shouldn’t have to explain them to you. Think to yourself that she perhaps cannot have children or has had multiple miscarriages and does in fact have (angel) babies . Maybe she decided that she was done trying, perhaps she couldn’t afford reproductive healthcare for in vitro fertilization. This woman you’re judging may have even been sexually abused or raped and has different views than you of sex.

Don’t ask why she hasn’t adopting either because that’s rude as well; perhaps adoption is not an option for her. Understand that some women choose that motherhood just isn’t right for them. No matter what a woman’s reason, it might not be something she wants to share with you.

The question itself could be very painful. So, the next time you think about asking another woman these type of questions think about this post and remember to be kind and not judge. As women we have enough in life that can be against us and we would benefit so much if we all strive to build each other up instead of tearing each other down. I challenge you to be there for each other and don’t stigmatize. 🐾